Before a Rooster Crows

"Before a rooster crows...."

I'm thinking about my christian faith and wondering why it is so hard for me to share it with others. My whole life I've never really spoken up for Christ. I never wanted to be one of those pushy Christians that either got made fun of or were the biggest hypocrites. In doing so I think I've watered down my own christian faith. I do believe in God and that Jesus died for my sins. It's disheartening to look back at all the pain I've caused myself by simply choosing not to follow Jesus. I'm not quite sure why I care more about what others think of me here on earth than that of what God thinks of me eternally. Sometimes I don't really understand myself because most of the people I try to impress I wouldn't even want to hang out with.

My dad always shared his salvation story with just about everyone he met. I remember that I use to be embarrassed by it. I thought people would get offended or make fun of him behind his back. Now I admire him, because when he was my age he wasn't afraid to trust God completely. Even though the Bible says it will be greatly rewarding, trusting God completely can be scary and frustrating at times. Reflecting on my life so far, I see that I've done a terrible job of running my own life, so I'm not sure why I still fight to try to do it......but it sure is a daily struggle!!!!!!